Saturday, April 03, 2004
Well, a lot has been going on this week. Here's just a quick little recap:
Fri 3-26
Well, if my memory serves me correctly, I went over to Alley's with Megan to watch movies and hang out and all that good stuff. Those who were present at the time include "Hot" Josh, Anthony, Erin B., Matt P., Chelsea, Jason P., Ellen, and Skylar. Then Skylar's brother Tyson came by for a bit and Jacquline and this girl (who I will assume was her sister) stopped by for a split second. We hung out and watched "Patch Adams" and "Shrek." Megan, Matt, Chelsea and I then left from Alley's and went back to Chelsea's apartment where we hung out with one of the infamous "Chicken-Run" boys (whose name, we discovered, is William). It was really cool because he was sober! It was also kind of funny because of the fact that he had absolutely no idea what a fool he made out of himself that one night a while back, haha! But it's all good.
But one thing that was really neat about hang out with William is that he seemed to be in need of something, like in need of a hug or something. I really wanted to witness to him and to do more than just like sit there, but I didn't. I felt quite a bit of regret the next day about it, but then I realized that it was probably for the best at the time because I probably would have scared him away or seemed a bit push (especially since I don't know him). But oh well. You know, when the time comes, God will show me the way.
Mon 3-29
Quite honestly-- I can't remember, haha! I really don't recall what happened on Monday. I think things were pretty much par for the course, same-old-same, run of the mill activity.
Tues 3-30
No PrimeTime for me! I had some major studying to do for my economics test! Although I did not study quite the amount that I had wanted, I was able to get a little bit done. More importantly, I slept and got to hang out with Anna and watch "American Idol," so that was cool.
During the day, though, I had to deliver a speech about voting for my public speaking class. I don't think I did the greatest job on this speech, but I think I did alright. Although, I was quite frustrated with the fact that I had to dress up for this for two reasons: 1) I decided to wear a dress because it was too hot out to wear my Tommy Hilfiger striped top (it has red and white stripes, lending to the sort of patriotic theme I was going for), so I was quite uncomfortable (it was rather short and just a tad low-cut), and 2) guys treated me differently, but not necessarily in a good way; they opened doors for me and payed more attention to me, but only because of how I looked. I mean, let's face it-- had I been wearing a t-shirt and jeans, no make-up and a baseball cap, they wouldn't have given me a second-glance.
Weds 3-31
Very busy and hectic day. I was definately beginning to freak out because it just seemed as though I had so much to do and so little time in which to do it. Not to mention the fact that right after my 2:00 class, I was leavin' for Savannah to go to the Jars of Clay concert! But before any of that happened, I stopped by the mail center to pick up a package my mommy sent me! Hehe. It was loaded with stuff (candy, pringles, a couple of CDs I left at home, my day-planner thing, my cross necklace, a backpack, some meds, some moola, and I think some other things I can't quite recall right now), so that was fun-- well, sort of. It wa just sort of a pain in the tookus because I had to stash the box somewhere (that "somewhere" ended up being Kori's dorm) because I wasn't sure that I had time enough to go all the way back to my dorm, eat lunch, do my homework for my creative writing class, and then be on time for that same class. And then, to top things off, my mom informs me that I should have brought the box with me because of the "personal information" on the box (Yeah. Because my address and name are so "personal" and "confidential." Sheesh.).
But thankfully, by the grace of God, I was able to grab lunch at the BSU, run back over to the Writing Center, type up my homework, and then bolt over to class. After class let out, I hustled back over to my dorm, changed clothes, got my stuff together, Megan picked me up, and then we went to the BSU to meet Jacquline, Skylar, and Hillary. After a quick pit-stop at the mail center and the gas station, we were off to Savannah to see Jars of Clay!
Once we got there, we met Sarah and her friend Tiffany. After we kind of figured out how the whole seating procedure was going to go, Megan, Sarah, Tiffany and I ran to a local Time Saver (it's one of those little quickie-mart type things that's connected to the gas station) to grab some food (and man, were we taking a leap of faith!). I just grabbed a couple of hotdogs (yeah, I know. I'm stupid. Sue me.) and then we ran back to the Civic Center.
After a little wait, we went on in and got situated. After being asked to go back out into the lobby several times by this event coordinator dude (only for him to be repremanded and us told to go back in by this other coordinator dude), we were able to sit down and kind of spread out our stuff so that we could save seats for the rest of the gang that was to join us: Alley, Paige, Benji, Vincent, Chelsea, Emily, "Moses", Josh K., Justin G., Callie, Josh M., and Cory. We also saw a lot of other people who we weren't expecting to see from CCF (we also saw Scott with some people I don't know if any of us really recognized).
The concert itself was okay. The opening band was pretty good for a bunch of middle-aged rockers. Once Jars of Clay came on, we got pretty pumped up. They're pretty good. I hadn't heard much of their stuff prior to the concert, so I didn't really know all of the songs or anything, but it was cool. Then they took an intermission (which we initially thought was the end of the concert all together), during which some evangalist dude spoke; now, I could go on for hours about what was wrong with this guy and what he had to say, but I just don't have that kind of time. But I'll leave my complaints for another day and another time.
Overall, the concert was alright; it was something to do.
Thurs 4-1
April Fool's Day! Luckily, I didn't really get fooled. I had English lab today, and that was fine. Then I went to health, after which I returned to my dorm for lunch, an hour and a half nap, and some studying. I didn't go to Bible study either. I needed time to devote to studying econ-- which, by the way, I was up until nearly 3 A.M. studying for!
Fri 4-2
And now, we reach the present (well, actually, the past, if you're going to be all technical about it, since this was actually written on early Saturday morning, but I like to look at it as late Friday night) I took my economics test and, while I wasn't entirely sure how well I did or didn't do, I thought I probably at least passed it-- and I did! I was so ecstatic, because I found out that I passed it with a 74!! Woo-hoo! I know there's someone out there wondering how on earth I can possibly be rejoicing in receiving a 74 (C) on my economics test, but you know what? I don't care! Haha! Boo-yah! In yo' face!
Anyway, I came back home, ate some breakfast, watched some "Sharon" and some "Ellen," then took like a three and a half hour nap (Mmmmm. Sleep gooood!). Later on, I got up, showered, got dressed, and then Anna and I went to the "SMall" (aka the Statesboro Mall-- it's really small, hehe) to search for a dress for me for formal (Eeh. That was. Yeah.), and then to Bi-Lo for foooood!
After we got back from the store, we came back and ate dinner while watching "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" and "Hardball" (Sad, sad movie, man! Definately keep a box-a tissue nearby on that one!), followed by a couple of installments of "The Cosby Show" (Best show ever created known to man! Hehe).
So yeah. That was my week. Busy week. And I know that the next three weeks will just get busier and busier. But the way I look at it is if I just pace myself, and hold strong to the Rock that is God, I will be just fine. And I truly believe that with all of my heart and soul! :-)
bohemianchik had an epiphany at 2:06 am
Wednesday, March 24, 2004
AMEN!
Alright, yes, that was kind of random, I agree. But I must say that God works in some mighty mysterious ways, and that is just all too awesome!!!
So I initially started this blog yesterday evening after I returned from Loco's (by way of the BSU), in a total and complete funk, feeling all sorry for myself, yada yada. My first thought was to get on here and vent all my frustrations and just totally rag on all the people that got on my nerves, said things that hurt my feelings, etc. I was all ready to put everyone on blast and just call them out for their faults and flaws, and God really just got on me about that.
It was so awesome how God just like got all over me and basically said like "My child, look. Things will get better soon if you just let them. Be patient and I'll take care of everything. Going online and calling people out is just not the way to go about healing a hurting heart. If anything, it will just make it all worse (you remember what happened last time, don't you?). So be patient and have faith in Me, and I will bring you comfort."
And you know, that's exactly what He did. Even though I went to bed pretty upset, I woke up even more upset, and went through the day with that same pessimistic mood, God place so many things in my life that just made me smile, you know? For instance, Megan sent me an e-card, which just totally brightened my day! It mayed me laugh, it made me cry-- it was just so wonderful!
I also decided to go to luncheon today. I wasn't quite sure what I was expecting it to be like (or if I had an expectations at all), but it turned out to be pretty amazing. It was amazing because I saw just how much people truly care about me and for me; I really felt the love, you know?
And while my day wasn't absolutely wonderful after that, I still was able to walk out of there with some hope and a renewed faith, you know? And I think we all just need that through fellowship sometimes.
Additionally, the speaker was really great as well. He was just really real, you know? I could relate to him so well, and I really enjoyed listening to what he had to say. That's always a great feeling when you can get something out of the messages you hear.
bohemianchik had an epiphany at 11:25 pm
Monday, March 22, 2004
Things That Go Bump in the Night
Do you ever get the feeling that someone likes you, and all thought they're dropping every hint possible, they are trying as hard as they can not to tell you they like you? Well, I am currently experiencing such a dilemma. And frankly, I find it quite disturbing! If anything it has made me very anxious (nausea and all)-- an emotion I hadn't experienced in quite some time.
Unfortunately, the presence of a fancier is not the only source of great anxiety for me. First of all, I have been really struggling spiritually lately. Last week was spring break-- a tradition that I have dreaded for years; I always get bored, which causes my mind to wander, which causes me to dredge up old (and usually unpleasent memories) or create new concerns (lack of company, presence of extra pounds, etc.), thus, creating a very stressful bout with my anxiety disorder. My continuously stressed and pessemistic mood causes tension between my mother and I, consequently causing tension between the entire family, and eventually exploding into one big family feud.
Another source of anxiety for me (as always) is school. It's so hard to stay focused as it is, but particularly when we are nearing the end of the semester. Then there's just the general fact of "not getting it." And that's how I feel about economics. I mean, I understand it to a point, but my study skills absolutely suck! There's just no other way to put it.
Okay, well maybe I'm being a little hard on myself. My study skills don't suck, per ce; the problem, rather, is my discipline-- that's what sucks. You know why it sucks? Because I have none-- not when it comes to studying, anyway.
Now, in addition to my academic obstacles, I also am dealing with social stuff here at school. The BSU Spring Formal is coming up soon, and I don't have a date. Now I know you're probably thinking:
I Don't Have to Go:
Well yes, and no. I am applying for BSU council; the winners will be announced at the formal. I have to go unless I have a very good excuse for missing it.
The Dance Isn't Until May; You Still Have Time to Get a Date:
Well, just as it was for prom in high school, people have already got a head start on the whole "date-getting" process. In fact, one of my friends is going to all three of the formals (one for BSU, one for Wesley, and one for CCF)-- and she's bringing a different date to each of them!
I Could Just Go Stag:
Psh. Yeah right. I'm sorry, but I'm just not secure enough in myself to attend such an event sans senoré yet. Maybe someday, but not today.
Not to mention the fact that I don't have a dress! Grrr.
I know that "this too shall pass" and all that jazz, but it's just soooo frustrating waiting, you know? I can't help but to wonder when this will all be over; all the anguish and frustration and anxiety. But you know what? I can't worry about it. I just gotta let it go. I have to just lay it all right out there on the Altar and then leave it! I can't do as Heidi says girls have a tendency to do: tell God, "Here-- I'm just laying it all out for You! Here You go! Take it! Rid me of all this pain!" and then go back the next day and say "Oh, hey, God. Yeah, excuse me. I, uh, left this [issue, problem, etc.] on the Altar. I'm just gonna pick this back up... Okay. Thank You!"
I mean, I know that all of these feelings are just an attack by the devil trying to discourage and corrupt me, but it's not gonna work! Not today. Not any day! Take that Satan!
bohemianchik had an epiphany at 8:17 pm
Sunday, March 07, 2004
Oh my gosh! This weekend was so amazing!!! Although Megan and I were sort of apprehensive at first and didn't really know quite what to do, we just prayed and prayed, and God just blessed us and moved us and totally worked through us, and it was awesome!!!
The host home parents, Miss Sherry and Mr. Lon, were so unbelievably sweet and welcoming. They were so warm, and they just really set our hearts and minds at ease. The girls truly were very sweet as well. They definately had some spunk to 'em, but that just made for an interesting weekend!
D-Now was so crazy and so much fun! On Saturday, we did some rec games at the field by the RAC. It was cool because we did some relay-type games, which was interesting, to say the least. Then, after the relays, we had a food fight!! I opted out (one of my girls didn't have a change of clothes, so she wasn't participating), but that didn't mean I didn't get caught (thanks to Megan!! Haha).
Just listen to what they did:
First, they soaked everybody with water. Then, after they got everybody all wet, they hit everyone with flour! Next came wet, cooked noodles, followed closely by mushy peas and carrots. Then, to top it all off, they poured chocolate pudding on everyone! Oh my gosh. It was just wrong, seriously! There was nothing right about it.
But aside from all that fun and funky stuff, we tried our best help these kids get to know Christ, and get closer to Him. As I said, Megan and I prayed a lot about teaching the Bible study and really trying to keep it a Christ-centered weekend (that we hope and pray develops into a Christ-centered life).
Honestly, we started getting a bit discouraged and we felt like perhaps weren't reaching them or that they were really in the Spirit and weren't taking what God was saying to them, on their own or through us, to heart, you know? But on our last night together, it was really awesome because we they really asked us some pretty deep questions and stuff. Although I was worried that I wouldn't say the right thing and felt like I didn't know what to say, I just asked God to speak to them for me, using me as a vessle. And that's exactly what He did, and I am so blessed and thankful that He did.
This weekend was such a blessing and it was so rewarding. God really showed me so much about His purpose for me in life. God showed me my strengths and talents, and He's telling me that I need to work with kids. Although parts of me worry about what He wants me to do, I realize that God has blessed me with the ability to connect with youth, and that's just what I plan on doing. Maybe it's just as simple as being a good parent (and if you know anything about me, you know that the last think I wanted to be was a parent!!). But He just showed me that if I can deal with complete and total strangers' kids, that I would be a really good parent (whether I adopt or have kids of my own or both).
So, all in all, it was a great weekend, and I grew so much in my faith and in my relationship with Christ! Rock on, man :-)
bohemianchik had an epiphany at 10:40 pm
Friday, March 05, 2004
Get Over Yo'self, Goodbye (Goodbye)
I definately need to get over myself and say goodbye to all of my selfishness. I feel as though my self-centered train of thought that I've been in lately has really been blocking the necessary communication between me and God. I really need to spend some time humbling myself and just giving all the glory to God. 'Cuz I mean, after all, it's not about me, it's all about Him. So that's all that should matter in my life right now, and I should just focus on Him and everything else will fall nicely into place...
bohemianchik had an epiphany at 11:24 am
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